Happiness #3 Don’t live beyond your means.

If you move and settle down in a neighborhood you can’t afford, you will be frustrated. The reason is you spend too much of your income on housing expenses and you will constantly be reminded that others have more resources than you, since apparently wealthier neighbors surround you. It is better to move and size down; forget the high-end housing, and appreciate being better off.

With the housing costs we have in Norway, I have to say I admire those who are bold enough to approach the market and buy a house. The cost of housing in Norway is really high, regardless of size and location. One thing is to calculate how much we can afford to pay for the house or flat itself, but we often forget the smaller posts in the budget like waste charge, water, phone, internet, TV, car expenses, insurance, leisure-time and recreational activities, child-minding expenses and gifts. The expenses always exceed what we initially thought.

To live is really, really costly.

You should think that going to school in Norway is free, but it isn’t really: class and school parties, excursions, advent calenders, canteen and personal computer constantly drain the budget. It is never a question of large amounts, but it adds up to quite a bit through the year anyway.

Many fall into the trap of accepting, and using, credit cards they can’t afford. I don’t find that strange at all. It is not smart, but understandable. Then and there you look for means which can help covering current expenses, and the credit card companies shower tempting offers on extra cash upon you. Tempting offers with catchy titles and slogans which hit bull’s eye. It is so easy to overlook the uncomfortable tiny print. Kind of embarrassing to give in and apply for an extra card, because we all know better, but still something I totally understand.

One should think that a belle would chime in the back of your head when thinking going to a sunny country to soak up sun, salty water and carefree days twice a year is something everybody can afford, and therefore you should too. For some reason we think we are the only ones, if struggling with a tight financial state.

EU’s definition to poverty is:

“Individuals, families and groups in the population can be said to be in poverty when they lack the resources to obtain the types of diet, participate in the activities, and have the living conditions and amenities which are customary, or are at least widely encouraged and approved, in the societies in which they belong”.

We focus a lot on the lifestyle to those who can afford, we seem to forget that only very few can actually meet the demands media present as normal. Those who can’t afford being up to so called standard don’t want to regard themselves as poor, and strive even harder to be what they think is normal. To end up in an overblown trap of luxury lifestyle is not all that uncommon, and very hard to escape.

Deliberately we have made choices which allow us a comfortable financial state. Funny thing is, though, if we didn’t have the option we do to choose to be thrifty, I am not sure if the chase for something better, or the temptation to live beyond our means would be this easy to avoid.

I discovered the liberation in having a secure income, I can afford to be economical. I don’t need brand name clothes or a new car, and I can choose to buy a kitchen from IKEA or a more expencive one. To have the means when the car needs service or when the insurance is due is simply lovely!

I don’t have to worry about it, and that is a huge relief. It’s a good reason to be happy for a while.

I have no idea what the right answer to what happiness really is, but ... although I shiver and tremble with freezing cold (perhaps not that strange as it is, after all, winter, and the wind has been whistling cold and hard for over a month now) spring is already well underway within me. I thaw and feel warmer inside, and although this is not the correct definition to what happiness is, I am sure it applies?