My collection of wise, and not so wise, postings

Thursday 19 September 2013

Some are heroes, some of us never are.

"Every hero becomes a bore at last."  I’m not quite sure whose quote this is, but I think it was Ralph Waldo Emerson...?

So…, I just googled it, and it is, in fact, R. W. Emerson who wrote it. (Heh, “googled it”; a new phrase which entered my vocabulary a couple of years ago. There is a world of meaning to it, and I think it is pretty international too.)

After a rather crappy day it was great to brag about myself, and feel an inch taller. I never remember names, dates or hours; I am one of those who need to write it down, and I have excess consumption of post-it pads… only problem is they grow so rapidly in number they drown in the chaos of notes… and I have to vary the colours, and soon all I see is a colourful clash of semi neon coloured notes, impossible to make sense of. So I tidy up a bit, throw away the outdated ones with messages I never remembered in time, and hang the rest in tidy order. The tidy order lasts for a little while until chaos strikes again. I don’t stick them just anywhere, you see, I stick them where I know I see them on regular basis. I used to use the messages on my computer screen, but that just failed. My screen looked as if I was hoarding messages, and chaos was a matter of fact. My screensaver (a pencil with an eraser and a message) was completely hidden for a while.


I found the quote about heroes today, as I was helping a student looking up the lyrics to a song she is going to write about. It wasn’t the phrase I was looking for, but it caught my eyes, and stuck to my brains.

I am awful like that… especially song lyrics. Catchy songs tend to stick, and I end up walking about humming, with occasional outbursts of loud, not too well (not always in key), right out singing.

Initially the quote "Every hero becomes a bore at last" struck me as a strange, actually rather peculiar, statement to make, but thinking about it, it makes sense.

On my way back home from work today I was thinking about people who stand out, and how much I enjoy their company… and then I thought about people who stand out even more, and how I am not likely to ever get to enjoy their company… and why not.

I think everybody, who face up to the fact they will never be a standing out hero (opposed to an everyday hero, which I think we all are, at some point) would like to be friends with a hero: To be in the position to say: “That guy’s my friend!”
As if the character rubs off, just by being in the same room together. In many settings we tend to try to earn credits through who we include in our circle (they may not include us, but that’s not really important, as long as we include them….)

It is important to us humans to have people to look up to. We need idols, we need someone to compare ourselves and our lives to.
If we can’t find someone compatible to what we strive for, we comfort ourselves with half the truth about famous people who apparently are just bad, at just about anything…  (or so we think, judging by the looks of their handbag or something).

Or we try, real hard, to be as good as, if not better.

The minute we see a chance to get closer to someone who is talked about in a favourable manner, we grab the opportunity with everything in us.

There is an old saying “the grass is always greener on the other side”. Funny how those old sayings seem to have everlasting truth in them.  We want what we haven’t got, even character. I guess that is a big part of being human.

And yet… as much as we admire people who are exceptionally good at something: People who are good at something somehow scare us. I can’t think of any other reason why so many brilliant people are surrounded by followers, but hardly any true friends, let alone confidenciality.

First of all: when people are really good at something, we like them because their qualities and skills make them stand out and be brilliant… which is admirable, and we like.

But to be that good at something, you need to engage, be interested in and put down a lot of hours, days, months and years to achieve the level of ability. To watch anyone that absorbed in a narrow topic is fascinating for a while, but then most people get bored, because they don’t have the same stamina and dedication, and when the hero continues: we drop out.

You may think that I don’t understand what a hero is. I think I do. I think a hero is as a person or a group of people that do something on for others in need, or defend honesty and integrity or a moral cause.

Heroes don’t stand by and watch or wait. They make things happen, they stand up for what they believe in, and through dedication and curiosity they make things better for others.
Doctors, musicians, engineers, gardeners... we find them in every trade, and in every layer of society.

It takes a lot of tenacity and dedication to become so good at something that you make a difference.

I have neither. I am a jack of all trades, but not a specialist of anything. My mind flutters in unexpected directions as I am rather distracted. I am not smart, but some wisdom has rubbed off on me through the years.

It is clear I will never be a hero, of any sort, but I am good at keeping them company. I am an expert at acting as if the deed they did, and do, was nothing less than what I would have expected of them.
(How much I admire their dedication... nah... they don't need to know.)

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