My collection of wise, and not so wise, postings

Thursday, 6 March 2014

Planning on a good life....?

Not long ago I was planning, hypothetically of course…ehm…, on living my dream. The dream was triggered by an acquaintance who bought himself an apartment in Spain. He told tales of very high standard, all facilities, gym, swimmingpool, security services, maintenance, tennis court, golfing, beach near by…, with enthusiasm. There was no ending to the luxury and comfort available. “And the best part,” he said, “it cost next to nothing!”

I went online, curious about what he was talking about. I scrolled through the real estate for sale ads, but I didn’t find anything which had that instant appeal to me. There was no luxury apartment I thought would be somewhere worth visiting on a regular basis. Nor would I want to live in any of them. I mean; If you buy a vacation home you really should enjoy the stay, even if you rent it out to others for long periods of time.
What I did find, however, was a run down vineyard, just outside a picturesque village. The stock looked dead, or at best very neglected, as did the house. But to me it looked like heaven.

Here we live in a development where the houses are really close to one another, and the yards are very small. I long for space; room for air and light and my own sounds.

I have dreamt of a place like that for a few years, but now it became more of a attainable reality. The place was there; just like I had imagined. It looked like the perfect place for me to live and wind down; A haven where my hectic lifestyle should change into lazy days of effervescent creativity.

I made plans: a local family who knew how to grow grapes should be hired and live in the renovated house. The stock would be brought back to luscious crops. I would build a functional villa for my family. I made sketches of annexes for the visitors, and they would be many and frequent.

I planned on a bench around the olive tree in the yard, with blue, checkered, cushy seating. In the branches I would hang empty jam jars with candles, there would be a table… at least 5 meters long with room for at least 20 people eating 3 hours long meals.

All in all I pictured this abandoned farm full of life, laughter and abundance. Lemon-, olive-, apricot trees, herbs, vegetables, fruit, berries, fresh bread and cheese…

I could almost feel the mild evening breeze and smell the scent of a good life. I would learn how to write, sew, paint, take wonderful pictures and just live.

The thought of going to bed in the evening, knowing what the weather would be like the next day, was alone a thought which was very appealing to me.

All geared up and excited I told my significant other (my husband) about it all, painted the picture in every positive adjective I could think of… and his response?

He looked at me for a few seconds, and I could tell I wouldn’t like what he had to say… “Hun”, he said, “I don’t even mow the lawn…”

Wednesday, 5 March 2014

40 bags in 40 days 2014

A year ago I joined the 40 bags in 40 days challenge. 40 bags in 40 days is a challenge which takes place during lent (the catholic period of fasting). To me this was a blessing in disguise. For many years I had this problem of collecting too much stuff around in my house. Read more here: https://www.facebook.com/events/637377976316873/?fref=ts 

I grew up with parents born before WW2. My mother always told me to take care of things, especially clothes, in case of rougher times. Actually, as a teen I used to redesign and alter clothes a lot and they turned out pretty cool. But that was the 80s, which was really convenient, because I couldn’t really afford buying clothes then and fashion back then allowed an individual style. At the time having access to stored, old stuff made sense.

Anyway, I learned that we do not throw away stuff, we keep it… thing is: things started piling up, too much of everything, and suddenly I looked around and discovered I never used any of it, but it took up a lot of space in my house. Space I would really like to clear away and make useful and presentable and room to breath.
I started off thinking that all the piles and boxes in my house was an impossible task to take on, when I stumbled upon this challenge I started thinking that a tiny bit is a lot more than nothing at all, so I joined. I didn’t do it the scientific way: I did not download the calendars or plans available everywhere on the net, I didn’t have a room or area scheduled each day. I just thought that I’d wing it. Everywhere was somewhere good to get started. But it was scary, I tell you.

At first it was really easy: a bag was filled in no time. Getting rid of a little bit of it all wasn’t too painful. Some days I even discarded a lot more than what I had planned. It was 5 minutes of contending passions. But as the 40 days was coming to an end it became more painful. I found things I had forgotten I even had, and I found things which I knew would never be used again, but memories overwhelmed me. It is stupid to hold on to broken etch a scetch just because my son wrote his name for the first time on it, but it is painful to get rid of.

I continued, though. Trying to be reasonable about it all, and after a while it became more of a personal cleansing. I reminded myself of the advantages I would get from it all:
-More space
-Easier to clean
-More presentable home
-Less clutter…. The list grew longer the more I thought it through.

On day 40 I started thinking I was doing something which was good for me. I could already see the results, and I was happy about it. The present became even more important to me, and the feeling of constantly to resign in frustration was replaced with the feeling of achieving something great. To me it was great anyway, and the family started to notice the changes in our house.

off to Salvation Army second hand store.
There was no reason for me to stop, just because the 40 days were over. Every day I got rid of another bag. Some days I just cleared out too small socks from my kids’ drawers, other days I finally got rid of boxes of pocket books I had read too many times.
One day I didn’t have much time to spare… less than my usual 10 minutes, so I grabbed a grocery bag and went into the bathroom. There I threw away empty shampoo bottles, expired creams, lotions and make up and I ended up filling up three bags.

I just love how good I am getting at getting rid of clutter… yes, I stopped calling it stuff or things; now I see clutter.

Today is Ash Wednesday, people from all over the western world are picking up on the challenge. To get some starting help you maybe need a schedule.

White House Black Shutters offers this one:

Or maybe you just use your calendar on your phone…
I didn’t need one last year; this year I have noted down areas to focus on each day… there is less to just shuffle into a bag now.


I noted it down on the family planner, which is in plain sight in the kitchen. The kids have become curious, so this year it will be more of a family activity. I just can’t wait until this afternoon… I am excited to get started!